Through Soundproof Glass
by Kentra02
Summary: Wufei struggles understanding his feelings for Duo


Title: Through Soundproof Glass  
  
Author: Kentra Shinataku  
  
Anime: Gundam Wing  
  
Pairings: 5+2  
  
Category: Romance  
  
Rating: PG  
  
Spoilers: None  
  
Archive: http://www.deathandpassion.cjb.net. If you want, ask and ye   
  
shall receive.   
  
Warnings: Romance, mild angstishness, ficlet, uhm… that's it…  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own you, your dog, or the characters in this fic. Though, I would like to own you. ^-~  
  
Feedback: Sure, I'd love feedback, though this is short so I don't know how much it deserves it.  
  
Notes: Chi made up the title ::beams:: Ain't it purty?  
  
**********  
  
Through Soundproof Glass  
  
It doesn't make sense to me. That alone scares me a little. I try to understand everything before I jump in blindly, but you, Duo Maxwell, are something that I just can't make sense of. And believe me, I've been trying. I just don't understand.  
  
What is this feeling I feel, the electric jolt in my abdomen that pangs when your eyes brush across me for a fleeting touch? I've never felt that before, at least not until you. After I found you, that feeling became an unwelcome companion of mine, one I couldn't shake. It travels with me every time you and I inhabit the same room. It makes me feel weak when I'm near you. Maybe weak isn't a good word, because it's not weakness in the sense I know, it's... different. It's something that I cannot describe. Thinking of you tends to have that effect on me, making me seem so inarticulate.  
  
When I hear your voice, especially when it's directed towards me, I feel as though I am somebody special, like I'm flying. Which is odd, as it has this effect on me even as you toss me a snide remark or insult. You could call me a worthless pig, yet I'd feel like I'd been accepted among the gods.  
  
Is this unhealthy? I really don't understand. What do these feelings mean? There's no way they could mean more than a simple friendship, right? No. And even if they were, you'd never go for that...  
  
Or would you?  
  
Sometimes I hate the way you touch so casually. You don't think about what I feel, you don't have these same emotions when you throw your arm lazily over my shoulder in jest, or sympathetically dropping your palm over my knee. When you touch me, a fire rips through me, starting at the point of contact and spreading, burning all over me until it finally settles somewhere behind my ribcage, filling me with a strange sense of warmth.  
  
What is that warmth? Is it just the vivacious glow from your bright amethyst eyes? Is it the shining bath of heat that radiates when your smile illuminates the room? Or is it something more, something deeper? I'm still unsure whether I want that or not. Even if I did, would you?  
  
I have to wonder if you're experiencing the same foreign sensations as I am. Or maybe they're not foreign to you. Perhaps you understand what I can't. But if you do, why don't you tell me, show me, enlighten me... anything. Please. Explain this to me. Tell me how you feel, tell me I'm not alone. Tell me I'm not crazy-- better yet, show me. Teach me. I'm waiting for your word.  
  
I have to assume, however, that you don't share these confusing, terrified emotions, these feelings that are screaming inside. You can't hear them, though. They might as well be screaming through soundproof glass.  
  
I only wish you could hear them.  
  
If you feel the way I do, I can't imagine how you could ever leave me. No, you'd feel the same pang of emptiness and loneliness that I do when you're not around. Even when I see your lovable smile disappear behind a closed door, I feel like somebody has turned off the light in my world, or the air, and I can't breathe without you.   
  
I just said lovable. I suppose there's no turning back now. I won't deny it any longer.  
  
But I'm so afraid. Perhaps I'm being mislead, maybe I'm just following blindly some sort of physical need. Though somehow, I don't think that is so. We're perfect for each other, don't you see it? I think you need me as much as I need you. I did say 'lovable', Duo, and I meant it. I love you, but you can't hear that. Just like I'm screaming through soundproof glass. 


End file.
